Beware! These things will kill your sex drive.

Some people do many things well when they’re stressed. But feeling sexy usually isn’t one of them. Stress at work, home, or in relationships can happen to anyone. Learning how to handle it in a healthy way really helps. You can learn to relax when you are stressed, a counsellor or doctor can also help.

Problems with your partner
Problems with your partner are among the top sex-drive killers. For women, feeling close to our partner is a major part of desire. For both sexes, watch out for fights, poor communication, feelings of betrayal, or other trust issues. all these will negatively impact your sex life. If it’s proving difficult to get back on track, reach out to a couples counsellor.

A lot of people believe a drink makes you feel more open to sex. But too much alcohol can numb your sex drive. Being drunk may also be a turn-off for your partner. If you think you have a drinking problem, seek help. Before it kills your libido.

Too Little Sleep
If your sexiness seems missing, it could also be because you’re not getting enough sleep. Do you go to bed late or rise too early? Do you have trouble falling or staying asleep, or a condition such as sleep apnea? Anything that messes with a good night’s rest can mess with sex. Fatigue impacts sexy feelings. Work on your sleep habits.

Having Kids
Technically, you don’t lose your sex drive once you’re a parent. But it’ll probably be difficult finding time to be intimate with your partner with kids under foot. Hire help or get someone to watch your kids sometimes so that you and your partner can have some alone time. New baby? Try a quickie during baby’s nap time 😉

Poor Body Image
Feeling sexy is easier if you like how you look. Work on accepting your body as it is today, even if you’re working to get in shape. Feeling good about yourself can put you in the mood. If your partner has low esteem, assure them that you find them sexy.


Portrait of couple embracing

For many women, their sex drive lowers tremendously around menopause. That’s partly because of symptoms like vaginal dryness and pain during sex. But every woman is different, and it’s possible to have a great sex life after menopause by tending to your relationship, self-esteem, and overall health.

Lack of Closeness
Sex without intimacy can kill desire. Intimacy is more than just sex. If your sex life is lacking spark, try spending more non-sexual time together, just the two of you. Talk, snuggle, massage one another. Find ways to express love without having sex. Getting closer can rebuild your sex drive.

Erection Problems
Men with ED (erectile dysfunction) often worry about how they will be able to perform sexually, and that worry can drain their desire. ED is treatable. Couples can also find ways of keeping it from affecting their relationship. If you’d like to identify some symptoms of ED, read this.

Some drugs can tone down desire. Switching drugs or dosages may help so ask your doctor about that. But never stop taking any medicine on your own. Tell your doctor, too, if your sex drive stalls soon after you start taking a new drug. For a list of drugs that can affect libido, check here.


Culled from WebMD


Exercises to help you have better sex

Did you know studies have found that extra weight lowers libido? If this is not the case for you the kudos. But if it is, then read on to find out some of the exercises you can do that will help you shed some weight and provide an added bonus: better orgasms!

Getting a good workout  can amp up the pleasure for you and your partner. Any activity that gets your heart beating faster and you breathing harder, whether it’s a brisk walk, cycling or dancing can boost blood flow — including to your nether regions. That’s a plus for both genders: stronger erections for men and greater arousal for women. 

Harvard researchers found that male and female swimmers in their 60’s had sex lives similar to people 20 years younger. Swimming helps build endurance, boosts blood flow, improves flexibility and strength, and diminishes stress. It also burns some serious calories.

Core Work
A strong and flexible core boosts almost everything we do. This also includes performing between the sheets. An added bonus? You may be one of the lucky people who can have an orgasm while exercising: something called a “coregasm!!!” It tends to happen during core-strengthening workouts like crunches. Lucky lucky You!

Frog Pose
This pose makes you more flexible during lovemaking, says NYC-based exercise physiologist Liz Neporent. It’s an intense hip opener that stretches your inner thighs, groin, and hips. It also releases stress, which can be a real buzz-kill in bed.

The Hinge
If you would like to hold yourself in a “particular position” without your back or legs getting tired or cramped, Neporent recommends practising The Hinge. Lean back at a 45-degree angle for a few seconds before returning upright, and repeat. The move is subtle but creates a lot of staying power.

These exercises were developed to treat urinary incontinence by strengthening your pelvic floor muscles. A strong pelvic floor also means explosive orgasms! Women may be more familiar with Kegels, but they also help men prevent premature ejaculation. Studies show most people don’t do them correctly though. Ladies, if you put a finger in your vagina, you should feel a pulling up when you squeeze. Men, your penis will lift up.

Planking works to strengthen the deepest layer of your ab muscles: the core, along with your upper arms, thighs, and buttocks. These muscles help stabilise you so you can stay close to your partner when and where it counts most. Do it once a day, and build up to 60 seconds or longer. If it’s too challenging on your toes, try balancing on your knees instead.

Cat/Cow Stretch
This yoga pose can also act as another form of foreplay. It limbers your spine, helps get you into an even breathing rhythm, and improves focus. Move with a steady flow, so that each rounding up of your spine(the cow part) takes a full breath out and each downward arch(the cat part) takes a full breath in.

Pelvic Thrust
This move is a key part of whatever your favourite position in bed might be: be it missionary or cowgirl. But powerful pushes can be exhausting when you’re out of shape. Work your glutes, calves, and hamstrings to build stamina and flexibility. Pelvic thrusts also sculpt your bum, so you look good and feel good.

Better Together
Couples who sweat together stay together, so make an exercise date with your significant other. Studies show that challenging physical activities spark arousal. You’ll be more attracted to your partner post-workout. So coordinate your actions; for example, run at the same pace or go to a samba class to strengthen your emotional connection even more.

If you would like to identify proven sex drive killers, check here.


Culled from WebMD


5 popular dieting mistakes to avoid

Crash Diets
If you are determined to lose weight fast, you’ll most likely turn to a crash diet. Some popular ones ask you to “eat” nothing but grapefruit or cabbage soup each day. You cut your daily calorie intake to less than 1,000 {very unhealthy BTW} and voila! The extra weight seems to melt away. But here’s the catch: eating very few calories trains your metabolism to slow down. And once the diet is over, you are left with a slow metabolism that burns calories slowly and the pesky weight climbs back up. Avoid crash diets.


Skipping Breakfast
Going without breakfast seems like a simple way to cut down on calories, but it leaves you hungry and peckish the rest of the day. This may lead to unplanned snacking and eating a giant lunch! This sends your daily calorie count flying. Instead aim to eat a breakfast high in protein and fiber. This will curb hunger throughout the day. In fact, studies show people who eat breakfast every morning are more likely to maintain a healthy weight. Never skip breakfast.

Losing Track of Your Snacks
Do you count calories at every meal? How about all those biscuits and sweets you nibble on when you are feeling peckish?  Mindless munching adds up and could sabotage an otherwise well-planned diet. If you’re serious about counting calories, you may want to use your smartphone or a notebook to keep track of every bit of thing that goes into your mouth. Well, not “everything” obviously, but you know the culprits I’m talking about. Don’t lose track of your snacks.

Not Snacking at All
While mindless snacking can add to your waistline, thoughtful snacking may do just the opposite. People who eat several small meals and snacks a day are more likely to control hunger and lose weight. Snacking helps keep your metabolism in high gear, especially if the snacks are protein-rich. Munch on a few nuts,  a good, high-protein choice. Research suggests people who snack on nuts tend to be slimmer than those who don’t.

Loading Up on Low-Fat
Low-fat products can play an important role in your diet. Just remember that low-fat isn’t the same as low-calorie, and it’s not a license to take second and third helpings. If you pile your plate with low-fat cake, you may end up eating more calories than if you had a smaller slice of regular cake. The best way to know how much fat, sugar, and calories you’re getting is to check the nutritional label.

How to walk in high heels

Moe Kelso, a model and the fashion expert on CBC’s TV talk show Steven and Chris, is a go-to pro for actresses who need tips on how to walk gracefully in heels. Here’s her method:

Stand tall (resist the urge to lean forward), pull in your midsection, and when you go to take a step, use your quadriceps. ‘Lift your quads so your toes are the last part of your foot to leave the floor. Step forward and land lightly on your heel, as if you’re putting your heel and toes down at the same time.’ And what is an appropriate height?

‘With practice, many women can get the knack of walking in two- to three-inch heels,’ she says.

A high heel is any heel that goes above 2 inches. But our feet pay a high price when we wear high heels. Heels that are 2 inches or higher propel the body forward, turning the simple act of walking into an awkward chore. They also point the foot downward, reducing its ability to flex and absorb shock. This leaves areas like the knees and hip joints to pick up the slack, which can aggravate and sometimes even cause arthritis.

But any woman who has experienced that terrific feeling of glamour while wearing a great pair of high heels will attest that there’s no substitute for these beauties. The benefits are also there: They give shape to your calf muscles and elongate the look of legs to make you appear longer and leaner. Wearing high heels may even improve your pelvic floor muscles.

10 staple items in a curvy woman’s closet

Every woman knows that there are some key essential outfits to own. These outfits are the corner stone of every wardrobe. For those who embrace the minimalist lifestyle, the key essentials are all they need. Different pieces can be interchanged and paired together to form a different outfit. Here’s a YouTube video, if visuals work better.

For the curvy woman, here’s a list of 10 items that form the cornerstone of our wardrobe

  1. Leggings

Leggings are a must have because they are so versatile. If you are going for a casual look, they can be paired with a long t-shirt and either flats or wedge shoes. Pair with a tank top and sneakers for a work out. And with a dress and heels for a more dressed up look.

2. Maxi skirt

The maxi skirt is my go-to outfit on hot days when I don’t want anything constricting my legs. They come in a variety of styles: asymmetrical, A-line, short, midi and long. They can be paired with a tank top, a turtle neck or any other form fitting top.

3. Pencil skirt

The pencil skirt is for the corporate gals. Paired with high heels, this look is an instant head turner for those who can pull it off.

4. Belts

Belts are a curvy gals best friend. On those days when you don’t want to a form fitting outfit, throw on a shapeless dress and go. Or use a belt to instantly transform the look.

5. Heels

High heeled shoes show off your curves. Simple. There’s just something feminine and sexy about heels. When I’m wearing them, I feel different, confident, bold, sexy. Even my walk feels different. Plus they vamp up any outfit.

6. Firm bras

A firm bra is another must have especially for those of us with ample bosoms. An ill-fitting bra ruins your outfit, your confidence and your posture. Saggy boobs give the illusion of slouched shoulders while a firm bra does the opposite. A good, firm bra will probably make a dent in your savings, but it’s a worthwhile expense. Check here for sites where you can find lovely bras for the amply blessed woman.

7. Shapewear

These cover up a multitude of rolls and cellulite and gives your outfit a smooth finish.

8. Black outfits

Black outfits are flattering on a curvy woman. They give a slimming effect and a nice silhouette. Another versatile staple for the curvy woman’s wardrobe, be it tops or dresses.

9. Jackets

Can be worn over tank tops, dresses or any tops at all. They come in a variety of styles as well, ranging from formal to casual.

10. Peplum top

A peplum top also hides some of those offending rolls. I wear a peplum top on days when I’m feeling bloated. Also a versatile piece that can be paired with skirt, trouser or leggings.


There you have it girls, if you have a wardrobe staple that I missed, please enlighten us 🙂 Drop a comment.

In this corner…

As curvy women, it is a real headache finding fashionable outfits tailored specifically for us. But the internet being the wonderful place it is, if one has the time and patience to do some research, it is possible to find a few gems.

This blog is going to scour the internet everyday to help you curate these gems in one place so you don’t have to go looking. Where possible, we’ll also include links where some of the outfits can be purchased.

Happy viewing 🙂

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